The Adventures of a Little Village Goddess: Collection
by WildButterflies
Summary: As the goddess of a small village, Kaoru is not powerful. Time seems to pass her by as she can only offer small things to her village. But when a desperate prayer calls to her, life changes rather quickly. (Rating is now m due to character death) -The last two chapters are Kenshin's side of the tale added 1/26 (Watch chapter names, more may be added as an epilogue)
1. A little goddess part 1

Author's note:

Still don't own anything.

This is a small series that I worry will spiral into an ungodly beast of a story. I will be following what's probably going to be an odd mix of the manga and anime later on.

I probably need to seriously look for a beta. So... any volunteers? :P

No? On with the story then! (That's right. Suffer my writing.)

 _ **Directory:**_

 _ **Kaoru's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 1- A little goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 2- A little goddess part 2**_

 _ **Chapter 3- A little goddess part 3**_

 _ **Chapter 4- A little goddess part 4**_

 _ **Chapter 5- A little goddess part 5 (End)**_

 _ **Kenshin's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 6- A boy and his goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 7- A boy and his goddess part 2 (End)**_

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Gods had existed far before humans came into being. Each one carried a specific purpose such as insuring the sun's travel, providing safe passage for all beings that died, and protecting areas. Eventually human beings came into existence, and with them, came a new type of god. Ones that depended on the belief, prayers, and offerings of humans to live.

Located in a small circle of mountains is a small village. The people are poor, but content with what is provided in their life. They may be cut off from the outside world, but there is always food from their crops and plenty of materials to make their small huts and clothing from. Unlike other villages, who have long forgotten their local deities, this isolated village depends on their goddess enough to provide offerings and prayers daily.

There are too few people to make their goddess powerful, but they provide what they can for her anyway. Kaoru will always provide what she can for them because of this. Her only purpose in her life is to bring rains and grant small wishes for her little village and it's people.

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Kaoru floats in her river. Today, she has already sent a blessed rain to the fields. Her villagers have been especially generous this year, and she is able to provide an even larger blessing because of it. She grins and flicks her tail in pleasure. They'll have a bountiful harvest this year. Kaoru has outdone herself.

Gentle prayers whisper in her mind. Almost all are for a good harvest, and a rush of pleasure floods her senses. Until the jarring sensation of a desperate prayer brushes across her senses. Her tail flicks in agitation and she quickly dives into her river. Her shrine is downstream and she can feel the prayer's origin is there.

They built her shrine on a dock so that it seems to hover over her river. A staircase descends into her river. She supposes they built it so that she could walk into the shrine with ease. Kaoru is able to focus on the desperate prayer better under the shrine.

 _Please, I beg of you. Please help me._

She can feel how the voice is begging her. It resonates within her until she can feel it vibrating in her chest. Kaoru strokes the weathered wood of the stairs in thought. She had never used them or turned her tail to legs, but she's tempted. Kaoru can only feel vague sensations of what the prayer is about.

This specific desperation tinged prayer is calling her strongly enough to override any misgivings over doing these new things. Well, there's a first time for everything. She has a surplus of strength this year so she can afford to use up a little more than usual. Kaoru hisses through her teeth and wills her tail to change.

A soft glow hides how the change takes place. It's easier than she thought it would be to turn her tail to legs. To her immense surprise, walking isn't difficult for her either. She peeks into her shrine's entry with curiosity over which villager is praying to her.

A heavily pregnant woman is trying to bow on the floor of the shrine in prayer. Her words are slurred with tears. "Please. I don't know what to do. I can't lose this one too. I can't bear it." Kaoru recognizes this woman as her most devout villager. This is the woman who lost two babes and her husband.

Kaoru utters a soft sigh in resignation. "I am here. Why does this pregnancy trouble you? Is it not further than the other two?" The woman jerks back in surprise at seeing the deity. Nobody had ever seen her before. Or, if they had, had never spoken of it. There wasn't a doubt in her mind that the strange woman with blue-black hair and cloud-like clothing is a goddess.

She doesn't notice that she's whispering. "Just like the others. The baby stopped moving." Those words open the way for aching hope. "Please. Can't you help me?" It's like a dagger is twisted in Kaoru's chest. She is not a strong goddess, and had never tried to do anything other than bring blessings and a gentle rain.

As well as grant an occasional wish, but nothing of this magnitude. She's not even sure she can. To make matters worse, the woman is still silently praying. Unaware that Kaoru will be the only recipient. Kaoru meets her eyes when she answers. She will not shy away from telling her devout the truth.

"A god is only as strong as the amount of offerings, prayers, and believers they have. For many years, I have felt the other gods fade from existence due to the lack of these things." The woman begins to look alarmed, and Kaoru continues, not wanting to give the woman time to panic. "I am in no danger of fading, but I am only able to grant small wishes, occasional blessings, and rain. I don't know that I can help you."

The woman's prayers cease at the news. Kaoru has to will herself to not look away from her when she presses her fingers to her mouth and starts keening. Eventually, the keening fades into sobbing. It's a while before the woman is able to speak in a dead voice. "I have served you faithfully my entire life. Ever since being given the job of keeping your shrine in good condition. Is there any way I could convince you to try?"

Kaoru is still trying to desperately think, but her hand reaches out to touch the rounded belly seemingly of its own accord. What is she supposed to do? She's never tried to do anything like this before. With her closeness to the unborn babe, she can sense how sluggish it is. What she can't sense, is the cause for this.

Nutrients are flowing and everything feels right. It almost seems like the babe just gave up. Her thoughts halt as an idea gently appears to her. What if she tries it as a blessing? So, she whispers in the language of her people and follows with the word that the blessing will attach itself to.

" _Live._ "

The mother's prayers had been humming in the back of her mind ever since she touched the skin separating the unborn child from the outside world. This time they felt of hope. The hope faded as a few minutes ticked by without any reaction from the unborn child. Kaoru feels so tired from the amount she had put into the blessing.

"Thank you for trying. Even if it didn't work." As if to contradict her words, a strong kick was delivered to her side. Her hands flew to her belly unwilling to believe in it should it be a fantasy brought on by desperation. This time a foot kicked against her fingers, and hot tears of joy ran down her face.

Kaoru left without the woman noticing. She was so tired. It hurts less to change back to her tail. The woman stumbled to the shrine's entrance only to see a shimmer of sapphire scales as the deity swam away. Another kick had her sinking to her knees and murmuring a prayer of gratitude.

It tickled the back of Kaoru's thoughts as she swam back to her favorite part of the riverbed. So tired. She wants to nap so badly, and the blessing on the crops earlier will guarantee the harvest this year. Just a short nap…


	2. A little goddess part 2

_**Directory:**_

 _ **Kaoru's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 1- A little goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 2- A little goddess part 2**_

 _ **Chapter 3- A little goddess part 3**_

 _ **Chapter 4- A little goddess part 4**_

 _ **Chapter 5- A little goddess part 5 (End)**_

 _ **Kenshin's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 6- A boy and his goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 7- A boy and his goddess part 2 (End)**_

Kaoru listens to their prayers as she sleeps. Still, their prayers are for a good harvest, which means she can continue to rest with the knowledge their prayers are already granted. Slowly, over the course of a few months, she regains consciousness. Kaoru hums as she stretches to work out the kinks in her body. Stretching is somewhat painful in a good sort of way.

She settles back onto the bottom of the riverbed to contemplate what to do for the day. Perhaps she could swim upstream and watch her village from the river? Her head tilts to the side as she thinks on that option. It sounds like a good idea.

Kaoru grins at the thought of watching them. Mind made up, she swims upstream to her favorite spot in the river. She's practically vibrating with excitement as she crosses her arms and rests her head on them. The village is built close enough to the river that she can see children playing with a ball.

She basks in the sounds of their giggling as they kick the ball between themselves. Really, it's only expected that they would accidentally kick the ball towards her eventually. Her head jerks up and she stops the ball before it hits her face. The children stare at it in amazement, and giggle happily in surprise when she gently pushes the ball to roll towards them.

She watches as they look around for her excitedly before going back to their game. A heavy sigh of disappointment escapes her lips before she smiles wryly. Only one villager may see her. Only the most devout, because the humans have to believe in her without visual proof. The ancient law is tightly wound into the core of all gods like her.

She rests her head on her arms absentmindedly. Too soon, the adults are already ushering the children back into their huts. Kaoru isn't surprised by the woman waddling her way to her watching spot. The woman tries to sit next to her carefully but still lands with a soft thump. Kaoru eyes her swollen ankles and the happiness worn like a cloak.

She brushes a small blessing against the woman's ankles. Now this one will be content like the others. "It's getting harder to see you. You look translucent to me now, and it wasn't so long ago that you were as real as any human to me."

She rests her hand over her stomach and almost swears that she feels her babe's life. "None of the others have mentioned being able to see you. Do you- Do you think that my child will be able to see you?" Kaoru is tempted to look at the child. It's only a moment that Kaoru wishes she could step onto land to do so.

It's probably best that she leaves something to surprise her. True surprises are awful difficult for her to come by. Besides, who doesn't love a little bit of mystery? "Perhaps." She murmurs. The woman smiles at Kaoru, and they watch the village in silence until sunset.

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Within the month, the woman comes to Kaoru's shrine again. This time with a babe in her arms. Carefully, she maneuvers herself onto the goddess' stairs leading into the water and sits on the step just above the water. It's with a sense of unwavering trust that she lays her boy on the surface of the river.

Kaoru can't help but hold the child. Small sparse hairs suggest that he'll be a redhead. "Shinta. His name is Shinta." Kaoru glances back at the woman only to freeze. The woman is unable to look into Kaoru's eyes this time. She can no longer see Kaoru.

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A few years later, Kaoru still watches her village from the river bank. "Only oni have red hair. I'm not playing with an _oni._ " Shinta's shoulders slump as the last child runs back to the others. She worries her magic is responsible for his red hair and purple eyes.

The humans are mainly dark eyed with even darker hair, but this one is so bright. Kaoru's tail flicks in agitation, and she watches the boy walk to the river's shore. He crouches in front of a large flat stone, and begins to spin his top on the surface. A soft cry of shock and a watery plop marks the moment the top spins off the rock and into the river.

Shinta makes a small noise of distress as he leans over the water trying to see his top. Kaoru doesn't think twice before she dives into the water and plucks it from the bottom. The look on Shinta's face is worth it when she not only gives it back, but spins it on the rock with a flourish of the wrist. His eyes dart to the river and back to the top before widening even further in awe. "Goddess?" Kaoru glances at him and makes eye contact by accident. Wait… eye contact?

 _Shinta can see her._

After that, he spends every day at the shrine or at her spot in the river. Each time, he plays games modified for her inability to stand on land. "You know… everyone in my village has made a wish. Except you. Did you want to make one? I might be able to grant it." His little face flushes red a bit. "A person who doesn't think I'm an oni. One that would be friends with me."

Isn't that just like a knife to her chest? She, who has done this to him the moment she interfered with him in the womb? "One day. One day you'll have one." Large, hopeful eyes focus on her. "Pinkie promise?" Kaoru seals the deal as she wraps her larger pinkie finger around his. "Pinkie promise."

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Kaoru knows that something has gone horribly wrong when the sobbing prayers begin. She's too weak from pain to move from her riverbed, and keens in agony each time she feels another believer die from the cholera ravaging her village. Eventually the pain begins to fade, and with it, herself.

The only thing she was able to do, was make their passings painless. Kaoru can feel one villager in her shrine. The last one alive. Slowly, ever so slowly, she makes her way to the shrine. Strangers had come to her village a short while before the cholera.

They had been trading with her people. Not a single one of them had come down with cholera. The last few days, she had watched them ransack the huts of her deceased villagers. Dread and relief war inside of her at the sight of red hair in the shrine. The only survivor is her favorite, but still a child.

How can he care for himself? She used up a small amount of energy to change her tail to legs and drags herself up the stairs tiredly. Shinta clings to her and sobs loudly. After a while, he quiets and whispers to her. "Goddess, are you leaving me too?"

Kaoru stares at her fingers, and notes how they're so translucent. "Only after you stop believing that I exist. Only then." They both fall asleep still holding onto each other. She's too tired and too weak to protect Shinta when the strangers drag him from her dock.

"He'll probably fetch an ok price. Everyone wants a child. They're the easiest to train when they're young." She screams in rage and pain and horror. In her anger, rain begins to pour harshly across the land screaming with her.

Kaoru never notices. She can only hear his cries and see him reaching for her.

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Half her energy goes towards influencing the strongest human's dreams. Save the child. Train him to be a swordsman and to protect with the sword. The other half goes towards pushing her faded body onto dry land until she reaches the bloodsoaked land. She watches as the swordsman saves Shinta and tries to remain conscious as Shinta buries all of the humans. Including the bandits.

The swordsman changes Shinta's name to Kenshin. Even though she is happy, she is weak and invisible to her own eyes, much less Kenshin's. Her body was never meant for dry land. Kaoru watches as he trains hard. The swordsman is nearly merciless in his training regimen. Eventually, he forgets her completely, and she fades away. The skies mourn her passing with a soft gentle rain.

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In a sense, Kaoru is still alive. "You want to live child?" The god of death's voice is gentle when asking. "The only survivor of my little village asked a wish of me. I pinkie promised." The deity cock's it's head at her.

"What a strange little goddess you are. A child that would have looked similar to you will be born tomorrow. The child's soul has already moved onto the next life, and the body will be stillborn. However, should you choose this, you will never be able to tell the boy who you are. You know the consequences of this action. Choose wisely."

The sensation of hope rose hot and sharp in her chest. "I must. No matter the consequence." The deity chuckled. "Then live child."


	3. A little goddess part 3

**_Directory:_**

 ** _Kaoru's side of the tale_**

 ** _Chapter 1- A little goddess part 1_**

 ** _Chapter 2- A little goddess part 2_**

 ** _Chapter 3- A little goddess part 3_**

 ** _Chapter 4- A little goddess part 4_**

 ** _Chapter 5- A little goddess part 5 (End)_**

 ** _Kenshin's side of the tale_**

 ** _Chapter 6- A boy and his goddess part 1_**

 ** _Chapter 7- A boy and his goddess part 2 (End)_**

Kaoru doesn't remember her time as an infant. She remembers her time as a goddess and struggles to adjust as a toddler that walks on land. Her first memories in this body are the cruel whispers of the women from town. "Poor girl, to have lost her mother so young. At least she died in childbirth. The girl won't have to suffer her loss as much this way."

And of course, the even more popular whispers. "That child is creepy. Her eyes look… _too old_ , and you know what they say about blue eyes…" Before this body, she had been used to watching humans from afar. Maybe her villagers were kinder than most humans, or perhaps she had never seen the small acts of cruelty from the distance.

However, she's not naive enough to think there's good without the bad. That is simply a fact of life. It's when she's five that the first consequence sets in. In order for a fading deity to survive, they must have a reason to live. She had claimed attachment, and the consequence is to dream of her attachment.

Dream being too vague a term. Really, her essence will leave it's mortal shell when she sleeps only to reappear with her attachment. From there, the consequence gets strange. Each night, she can choose two of three senses. Touch, sight, and sound. The consequence will continue until such time that the attachment tells her to leave and never return.

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Waking instead of sleeping feels as though she's surfacing from her river. ' _Sight, sound, touch. Which two do you desire?_ ' Sight and touch seem most reasonable. She could figure out how to communicate without her voice.

Kaoru opens her eyes to a dark alley with three men talking. "Marrying your beautiful childhood sweetheart, you lucky dog." One of them says. The young man his statement seems to be directed towards flushes and ducks his head with a small shy smile, curled at the edges with pleasure. "Thank you." He murmurs joyfully.

His smile slips from his face as a serious expression takes over. "But I can't help worrying. In these troubled times, why should I-" Kaoru gasps from shock as they walk through her. Looking down at her body, she observes her appearance retained that of her mortal shell with the addition of slightly glowing.

Stunned from the observation she looks up and stares at gold eyes that have appeared behind the men in the alley instead of listening to their words. They glance at her before focusing on the men. Kenshin? "-Must have your deaths." No. Kenshin wouldn't talk like that.

The metallic rings of swords being drawn attracts her attention. Numbly, she watches the man -Not Kenshin. He can't be Kenshin.- strike down two men. He turns on the third. The one that is going to marry his sweetheart and live happily ever after, her mind insisted. Mercilessly, he is slashed across the chest. Kaoru can see the moment his eyes focus on her.

"I… don't want to die. I was… finally going… to marry her. I would have… loved her… forever." Each pause he drags himself to her until he touches the bottom of her white sleeping clothes with bloodied fingers. "To-" The man with gold eyes makes it rain blood while finishing him off.

The dead man's fingers are still tangled into her hem, so she gently untangles them. With a cold horror, she lays his hand on the ground carefully and brushes his eyes closed. He must have believed her to be a deity of death, she thinks. The murderer is leaning on his sword, still lodged in the dead man, staring at her.

Details begin to emerge with the dead men's lamps so close. Red hair, like blood, and violet flecked gold eyes. He tracks her movements as she reaches out to touch the bleeding slash on his face. Her heart in her throat, she mouths his name, and his eyes go wide. Kenshin jerks back from her like he's been stung when other men walk into the alley.

He glances at her before talking with them. Kaoru is at a loss for what to do when he starts to walk away. "May you find happiness… in your next life." She wasn't meant to hear it. In fact, she was sure none of those closer to him had heard it. That whisper said with aching grief had her following him without further hesitation.

In silence, they walk to an inn. Kenshin seems to avoid all of the men talking in groups. Kaoru looks over the men and notices how they all avoid looking at Kenshin. Observes the way they grow stiff as he passes them. Eventually, they walk into the inn's quiet courtyard. His expression is cold as he washes his hands in a basin.

He continues washing after the blood is gone, and his eyes are unfocused. Kaoru is still learning human behavior, but this seems even more strange than most behaviors. Slowly, she reaches up to wrap her hand around one of his wrists. Kenshin jerks back from her and she can see the whites of his eyes from how wide they are in shock.

His lips are thin and bloodless as he pries her fingers from his wrist. Rapidly, he walks back into the inn and to a room with clothing strewn everywhere. Benches and basins of water are spaced every few feet. Kaoru's face flushes red as she realizes she followed Kenshin into a bathing area. She can't move fast enough to stand outside the door.

Kenshin's amused expression escapes her notice. She bounces on the soles of her feet for a while. A few sullen glances at the shoji, and he has yet to come out. Kaoru sighs and begins to twiddle her thumbs. Well it's understandable it would take a while. After all he was covered in- Nope. Not thinking about that.

She stares at the shoji intently when she hears footsteps on the other side. Kaoru perks up when the shoji opens before jerking back in horror at the sight of a very naked and very elderly man. Never does she want to see anything like that. Ever again. She presses her fingers over her eyes and leans against the wall.

What if Kenshin is in there trying to wash blood off after it's already gone? She'll- She could- Maybe she should go in there and see if he's ok. Without seeing anything. Kaoru could keep her hands over her eyes and walk around until she bumps into someone. So far only Kenshin and the dying seem able to see or touch her.

If she was able to make noises, she would have shrieked when Kenshin started tugging her hands away from her eyes. Instead, she flails and falls over to his disbelief. He stares at her with a raised eyebrow before setting her upright. "Come." Kenshin walks towards the inn rooms.

Belatedly, she rushes to keep up with him. He shuts the shoji after she walks in behind him. Kenshin moves to sit against a table by the window. After he settles his sword in his lap, he looks back at her. "Explain." _Idiot_. Doesn't he realize that she would have said something by now if she could?

At her scathing look, he tries again. "Can you speak?" Settling across from him, Kaoru shakes her head no and taps the floor twice. "Are you alive?" Nodding this time, she taps the floor once. "One tap for yes and two for no?" This time, Kaoru taps the floor once sharply. Glad to be rid of nodding. It was already making her head hurt which _shouldn't even be possible_. She doesn't have a body.

"Are you a god?" At this question, Kaoru freezes. Does she consider herself a deity anymore when she's just a faded creature in a mortal shell? Carefully she taps the floor twice, pauses, and taps once more. "Is that a maybe?" Two taps this time. "...Were you a god at one time?" She glances at him sharply. Clever boy. One tap.

"Do you know me? I mean, you did sort of say my name…" This is the question that stumps Kaoru. She can't tell him yes, she doesn't want to lie, and she cannot draw anything. Kaoru crawls closer to him and holds out her hand. She sighs and grabs his hand when he doesn't move. Running her finger on his palm, she traces the characters for ink on his hand.

He frowns at her for several moments before speaking again. "I can't read." Of course he didn't. Of. Course. Maybe she should have chosen sight and sound instead, but she had thought that touch would make her feel more real. He rustles through the desk and pulls out a brush set and papers. "You could draw something maybe?"

She stares at the items for a while before inking a portrait of a woman from her first set of memories. Kaoru watches the way his fingers tremble when he picks up the paper. "My…. mother?" One tap. "You knew her?" One tap. Kaoru carefully watches the expression on his face fade back into the cold unfeeling mask.

"Why are you here?" She inks the characters for friend on another paper. He draws away from her irritatedly and snaps when she tries to give him the paper. "I can't read." Sighing, she drops the paper and throws her arms around his neck. It feels strange to be so small when her previous memories of him were of when he was smaller.

At first he's stiff in her arms, but when she starts to pull away, he drops his sword to pull her back. Kenshin falls asleep first. Kaoru wakes in her mortal shell not remembering when she fell asleep.

Koshijirou, her mortal shell's father, is carrying her to the kitchen for breakfast. "Hey Ru, you wouldn't wake up for a while there. Thought I was going to have to dunk you in some cold water." Kaoru always feels guilty around this man. He lost his wife and his child. She had taken his child's place like some kind of changeling and he didn't know.

Always, she wanted this man to know that she wasn't his real daughter. Always, she had been too afraid to do so. After what she had seen last night, she realized life is too short for samurai. Too short for her to keep expecting him to return home for her to tell him. "I'm not your Kaoru. The real one was stillborn and I took her body."

The man set her down in front of the dinner table and began to serve their meal in silence. "When my wife was pregnant, she told me of a dream she had about a goddess that looked like a mermaid. The goddess apologized to her and delivered the news of a stillborn child. Then asked permission to use our unborn child's body. My wife apparently agreed. She informed me our child would be named Kaoru and have blue eyes. I never believed her tale until she gave birth to a girl with blue eyes. Even if you are not my child, you were born into this life as my child. So to me…. To me you are my second child."

Kaoru's chopsticks slipped from her fingers. "Now eat your breakfast Kaoru."

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Kenshin laid down rules for her. She is to wait in his room unless she appears outside in which case she is to wait for him to finish his business. Preferably facing away from who he's killing and with hands over her ears. Kaoru wants to protest about him ordering her around but… she doesn't want to see that again.

Every night he plays small child's games with her. Eventually she'll tell him she's actually far older than he is. As for now, he seems happy to play. Tonight, she wakes to him spinning his top on top of the desk. Kenshin makes a small noise, almost a squeak, when it falls off the table and rolls into her feet.

Feeling a sense of deja vu from so long ago, she placed it back on the table and spun it. He looks at her oddly, but seems to ignore whatever feeling of deja vu he may be experiencing as well. They spin his top all night. The next time she comes, he has a woman on the futon that he never uses.

Flushed with embarrassment and refusing to look at her, he petulantly speaks to her. "It's not what it looks like. She's just a drunk that saw me kill someone and I didn't want to kill her." Kaoru just offers a smile and sits next to him quietly keeping guard. Over the next few nights, he seems happier. More alive.

Kaoru is not jealous. She most definitely doesn't feel like a knife has been driven into her chest every time he lights up at the sight of Tomoe. Kaoru is startled to wake in a small village where the two of them have settled down in a house. Together. She is happy for the two of them. Both seem happy here.

Kaoru tries to stay out of their way when she wakes. Eventually Kenshin has enough and hunts her down. He sits quietly next to her on the hill outside his home. "You're the goddess from my village aren't you?" Kaoru smiles faintly but doesn't tap. Instead she stares at the stars.

She ignores the quiet rustling sound he makes. Eventually it stops and he places his top in her hands. "You kept your promise of giving me a friend. It's my offering to you." Kaoru rolls the top between her fingers for a moment. Feeling out the feelings he had when he used it. Loneliness. Grief. Joy. Contentment.

She smiles softly before pressing the top back into his hands. Kaoru wakes in her home with her father with joy in her heart. Kenshin's going to be alright. He's going to love Tomoe forever, and one day they'll have children together. She is content with the knowledge.


	4. A little goddess part 4

**_Directory:_**

 ** _Kaoru's side of the tale_**

 ** _Chapter 1- A little goddess part 1_**

 ** _Chapter 2- A little goddess part 2_**

 ** _Chapter 3- A little goddess part 3_**

 ** _Chapter 4- A little goddess part 4_**

 ** _Chapter 5- A little goddess part 5 (End)_**

 ** _Kenshin's side of the tale_**

 ** _Chapter 6- A boy and his goddess part 1_**

 ** _Chapter 7- A boy and his goddess part 2 (End)_**

Kaoru spends every waking moment with her father after her talk with Kenshin. Koshijirou takes every opportunity to teach her something new. His attempts at teaching her cooking ends with unmitigated disaster. At first everything was burnt to a crisp and yet somehow soggy.

Eventually it became only soggy. This is something that confounds Koshijirou. He watched and made sure that everything was done exactly as instructed and yet it would still end up waterlogged. The only womanly art Kaoru succeeds with is embroidery.

His home has a dojo for him to practice in and slowly he is creating his own style. There's a purpose for his new style in mind. Possibly something that would have him proclaimed mad, but it's a far off dream at the moment. Not even a fully formed idea really, but it is enough to give him hope for something new after the war.

He can feel Kaoru watching him from the shadows as he practices. Often he forgets what his daughter is, but when he sees the fire in her shadowed blue eyes, he remembers. Kaoru will never be taught his current sword style. However, one day, he will teach her the one he is trying to create.

At night, Kaoru continues to watch Kenshin and Tomoe live happily. She cannot stop coming unless he speaks the words demanding her to leave and not return. So instead, she decides to do small things while there. Kaoru pulls weeds in their small garden, and fills their emptied buckets with water from the river.

Sometimes, on quiet nights, Tomoe will sit next to where she's weeding and watch the weeds seemingly jump from the ground and join a pile. Eventually Tomoe brings ink and paper with her and sets them next to the weeds. For a long time Tomoe says nothing. "What are you?" Carefully, she writes out vague answers.

The nights continue like that for a long time. Tomoe had, at some point, been horrified by her clumsy writing and taken it upon herself to teach Kaoru how to better write. After that, Tomoe invited her into the house and continued their lessons as she wrote in her diary. Kenshin watches them both with fondness.

Kaoru often wonders if he's imagining Tomoe teaching his own child one day. And then, Kaoru comes and their house is dark. The night before, she had been unable to sleep. As a result, she had fallen asleep early in the day so perhaps she had merely missed them. The sun's light glitters as it touches the snow. Slowly she looks around for footsteps.

There's only one set that she can see, and so she follows them into the woods until she finds a crumpled letter. Unwrapping it, she reads the contents. The taste of bile rises in her throat and she tosses it to the side in favor of running through the snow. She ignores the bodies and blood.

Kaoru is too late. She shrieks in horror as Tomoe moves between Kenshin and a much larger man. A blink of the eye and everything's over so quickly. Tomoe and the man crumple. Kenshin grabs Tomoe and gathers her closely. Kaoru is too far away to make out what they're saying as she closes in.

She's leaning next to Kenshin, over Tomoe, gasping for breath when Tomoe draws her dagger across Kenshin's face. She smiles at both of them. Her last view will be of Kenshin and her mysterious weed picker. Tears prick the corners of her eyes as she tries to wipe away their tears. She feels peace as she whispers to them. "It's alright… So please don't cry…"

Tomoe slowly blinks once before she sinks into death's embrace. Kaoru can only watch Kenshin sob out entreaties to Tomoe's body. "Can't you do something?" Her eyes slide to the death god that is coaxing out the soul. It's eyes meet her's before responding. "There's nothing you can do about this one. Not even I could save her." Kaoru taps Kenshin's shoulder twice before placing her fingers over his hand.

Kenshin jerks away from her touch. "Don't touch me. Just- just go away. Leave me alone." He hadn't told her not to come back, but she felt the binding happen just the same. The first consequence is broken. She grabs the top from inside the sleeve Kenshin keeps it in when she feels herself fading.

Kenshin turns to snap at Kaoru only to stare at her in horror. "Wha- No. No, I didn't mean it. Please not you too…" He reaches out towards her with a hand just as she fades back into her shell. While Kenshin sobs in the snow, Kaoru sleepily stares into her room with her fingers wrapped around the top.

Kaoru falls into the sleep of a normal girl. Oblivious to the terror of Koshijirou when she won't wake up the first few days. Koshijirou stood off to the side as the family doctor looked over Kaoru. Doctor Gensai looks up at him and shakes his head. "It looks like a severe case of exhaustion. We just have to make sure she's getting food and fluids in her system."

The consequence made sure that Kaoru's mind was never rested along with her body.

Kaoru slept for weeks under the watchful eye of Doctor Gensai. She looks up at him blearily when she wakes before bursting into sobs. "What's wrong Kaoru?" But she can't tell him, or anyone, of the consequences.

A few days later, she's kneeling before her father with her forehead pressed to the tatami mats. "Otou-san. Teach me swordsmanship." Her father stares at her sternly before smiling. "Yes, of course I'll teach you. It'll be something new that nobody else has ever considered possible."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

The second consequence takes place when Kaoru is fifteen. By this time of her life, she's convinced it was all a dream. The memories of her being a goddess have been reduced to the dreams of a young child. Every step feels like knives are stabbing into the skin of her feet.

But Kaoru didn't master her father's swordsmanship style without being able to bear pain. The blisters that showed up on her skin from practicing long hours with a bokken and the bruises from hits the other students landed have well versed her in pain. She can bear this just as she did the taunting from the male students and the whispers of women.

Koshijirou noticed that his students didn't take well to a woman learning swordsmanship. Not just learning, but being better than them. When he first moves to intervene, the fire in his daughter's gaze stops him. Not only does she take them down, but she doesn't gloat over it.

By the time she was sixteen, several students had asked for her hand in marriage. Koshijirou refused them all. When -if- that time came, Kaoru would be the one to make the decision. At seventeen, her father is drafted to the Seinan war and never comes back. Her feet are always covered in blood from invisible wounds due to the second consequence.

Doctor Gensai checks in frequently to check for infection. His students make offers to her and promise to keep the dojo alive. A few of them even promise she can keep her bokken. It's enough to make her want to smack her bokken across their heads until their skulls crack.

And then, they all leave the dojo when a street killer calling himself Battousai talks of using the Kamiya Kasshin style. Kaoru is alone again. Somewhat. Kihei, the housekeeper, is still living with her. She thinks of him as almost like family even with his badgering about marriage and selling the dojo. Kaoru rarely eats and grows complacent with her practicing while in grief.

Murmurs of a Hitokiri Battousai murdering people on the streets using the Kamiya Kasshin style forces her to patrol the streets. The third consequence is that Kaoru will not know Kenshin when she sees him. "Hitokiri Battousai! I finally found you!" It's not until she bashes him into a fence that she realizes something is wrong.

A wanderer with a harmless sword. Kaoru could have slapped herself silly for attacking a poor wanderer. Judging from his clothing he is destitute. She's torn between wanting to burn the clothing, rip it into shreds for rags, or take a needle and attempt mending them. The shrill sound of police whistles draws her into action.

The large man attacking the police doesn't first the diminutive man in her memories. Dreams. They were only dreams, she firmly reminds herself. The distraction, forgetting to eat, and the pain of her feet prove to be her undoing. A delayed reaction and misstep allows the man to slash across her arm and move into position for a final blow.

"Eh?" Her eyes are wide with shock as she stares at the wanderer carrying her off. "You are quite the risk taker." His voice is amusedly rueful. The large man, she's not going to call him Battousai because the conflict between dreams and reality is making her head _hurt_ , makes his getaway.

"He's using my family's swordsmanship to murder people! I have to- have…" Kenshin doesn't know how to respond when the girl faints in his arms. Glancing at the police force remaining, he runs off with her to the first dojo he remembered walking by when he came to Tokyo. Luckily it seems to be the right one, if the sign that screams Kamiya Kasshin Dojo has anything to do with it.

The man inside seems less than worried over her unconscious state more than the strange man in ragged clothing carrying her. The doctor he calls is different and speaks to Kenshin rather than at him. "Wait, I think she deserves to thank you for helping her. You should stick around until she wakes up young man." Hesitantly, he waits in the dojo while the doctor treats the girl. He politely looks away when the wound on her upper arm is bound.

Kenshin's eyes are wide when the doctor takes off the girl's shoes to reveal blood soaked bandages on her feet. After the bandages are removed to reveal feet devoid of wounds, Kenshin's moving closer without realizing. "What?" The doctor glances over at him. "I don't know. Started about a year ago and I don't know what's causing it."

They sit in silence until Kaoru regains consciousness. Kenshin is staring at the names left on the dojo wall so she tells him of her dojo's downfall. She could never have suspected the contemplative look on his face would lead to the exposure of Kihei and Gohei, the faux Battousai using her family style to murder as revenge. Kaoru stares at the wanderer that took down every man attacking her dojo. The same wanderer that proclaimed himself to be the real Battousai.

His stature fit that of the man in her dreams. "My apologies, Kaoru-dono. I didn't want to hide the truth. It was just something I didn't want to talk about if possible." He had no right to have puppy eyes. Her thought process stutters as he walks away. "Excuse me. Farewell." Now wait just a minute, she thinks with her eyes flashing in anger.

"Wait a second! How am I supposed to clean all this up by myself? You made a hole in my floor! I don't care about your past!" A deceptively carefree smile is pasted on his face. "Considering Kihei, perhaps you should care. It's better if I leave. You don't need the real Battousai here after finally clearing your name." Kaoru's eyes narrow. "I'm not asking the Battousai to stay. I want you, the wanderer-" She cuts herself off and turns away from him.

"Forget it. Leave if you have to, but at least tell me your name. Battousai was the name of a patriot a long time ago." Of course, if he had wanted people to know his name, nobody would be calling him Battousai would they? "But then I guess you wouldn't want to tell me your real name." Kaoru's shoulders slump at the sound of shoji shutting.

She had wanted answers about why her dreams seem to be based in reality. Where did she know the Battousai well enough to dream about him accurately? "Kenshin." Her head snaps toward him and suddenly she recalls why he looks familiar. The dreams are memories. "Himura Kenshin is my name now. I'm a little tired of traveling. A wanderer never knows where he's going or for how long, but if you don't mind, I'll stay with you for a little while."

Wait… "If you were a warrior during the Bakumatsu, then just how old are you?" A seemingly docile expression on his face precedes him speaking. "Oro?" Her eyebrow ticks a little at the ridiculous word. "Don't you oro me, you can't be over thirty with a face like that!" A dawning horror presses at the back of her mind. "Well let's see… How old am I?" He counts his fingers murmuring under his breath.

" _You don't know your own age_?" Why couldn't he make this easy on her? "Twenty-eight?" The fact that it's phrased like a question makes her want to smack him over the head with her bokken, but everything _hurts_ right now. Instead, she settles on the facts. A person that's twenty-eight could still look that young with good breeding. It doesn't mean that she had interfered too much when she pressed magic to a woman's womb so long ago… Right?

It's then that she recalls the third consequence. After all, if her dreams were reality, then it can only mean the consequences are as well.


	5. A little goddess part 5 (End)

_**Directory:**_

 _ **Kaoru's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 1- A little goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 2- A little goddess part 2**_

 _ **Chapter 3- A little goddess part 3**_

 _ **Chapter 4- A little goddess part 4**_

 _ **Chapter 5- A little goddess part 5 (End)**_

 _ **Kenshin's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 6- A boy and his goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 7- A boy and his goddess part 2 (End)**_

Life after Kenshin moved into her dojo passed by… What is the word she's looking for? Eventfully. Eventfully is the word. It begins when he brings her a boy named Yahiko as a student. An ungrateful loudmouthed student. Then a fighter for hire, Sanosuke, joins her family.

Megumi, a doctor that once made opium, is the next to join them. An awful fox woman with a tendency to lean and fawn on Kenshin. Which does _not_ irritate Kaoru. Not even a little bit. Nope.

Each of them are equally horrified at Kaoru's soggy and often soupy attempts at cooking. Megumi had attempted to teach her how to cook like a woman with a flick of her hair and an examination of her nails. Three hours into that lesson, she stumbled out of the kitchen with wide horrified eyes. "How? Just- How?"

Kenshin's cringing even as he inquires. "What's wrong Megumi-dono?" He didn't despise Kaoru's cooking like the others, but he certainly didn't envy Megumi's self-given task. "Everything was done perfectly. Perfectly." Megumi's eyes have manic gleam to them as she reaches out to grasp his gi.

"I don't know what happened." Yahiko and Sano are leaning away from Megumi's temporary insanity. Both are uncharacteristically quiet with looks of horror pasted on their faces as they try not to bring attention to themselves. Their heads snap to the shoji when Kaoru's voice echoes from the kitchen.

"Megumi? Are we going to try again?" Megumi's horrified eyes snap to the shoji, and her knuckles turn white in Kenshin's gi. "Oro?" Somehow Megumi had surpassed even Kenshin's speed in her escape. He hadn't even seen her move. Even stranger, he has no idea how he landed on the floor.

It isn't until a few months later that Megumi confronts Kaoru. "Have you noticed that your cooking turns into soup when people are injured?" Kaoru pauses in thought before responding. As a goddess, her element had been water and rains. Even now, it seems that it rains when she's upset so perhaps… No. Her old abilities couldn't possibly be influencing her cooking.

"No." It's the truth in a way. She truly hadn't noticed. Megumi's eyes narrow at this and she hums non committedly. "I see…" Really Kaoru shouldn't have been surprised when Megumi asked Kaoru to cook the day after. Unknown to Kaoru, Megumi had watched the healing rates increase exponentially upon their injured friends' consumption of her food.

Megumi felt conflicted. She is a doctor first and foremost, but this? This is outside her realm of knowledge. Late at night she resolves to watch quietly and study the results. Perhaps one day she would unlock the mysteries of Kaoru's horrid cooking.

The days continue in a blur of family and revenge plots from Kenshin's enemies. Kaoru can never tell Kenshin who she is, but she still has his top buried in the bottom of her keepsake chest. Well, her top. After all it was given to her as an offering.

Kaoru is proud of the fact that she's managed to not only keep her promise, but multiply it. Each day, she watches them all at the dinner table interacting joyfully. Not just friends, but family, and isn't that a great deal more precious than what was promised? And then, Kenshin leaves. The pain of her body is too much to handle with the pain of her heart. In the end, it's Megumi, -Really, Megumi of all people- who encourages her to go after him.

She works hard to ignore the call of the water and focus on Yahiko instead while on the boat. When the boat reaches land, Kaoru feels the pull of something calling her. Yahiko's panicked voice is barely registering because she has to go there. She enters a small secluded hut without knocking or speaking to stare at a small shrine with wide eyes.

A large man stares hard at her as she runs her fingers over the delicately carved shrine. Kenshin also stares at her in shock. His first thought had been anger because how dare she follow him here when he was only trying to protect them all by leaving? He hadn't wanted to look at her, but the bizarre behavior and Yahiko's panicked state shock him enough to stare.

Kaoru's fevered gaze lands on Hiko, and she drops to the floor and presses her forehead to the tatami. "It is a pleasure to see you again Hiko-san. Truly I owe you a great debt for the favor I asked of you." Kenshin and Yahiko watch her with wide eyes only to be interrupted when Hiko glances at them sharply.

"Baka deshi, take the boy and fetch some water." Hiko lets his murderous ki loose in the hut when the boy starts to protest instead of following Kenshin. He watches the boy shoot him a mutinous look before scampering off. Ugh, children still give him the hives.

Hiko turns all of his attention on the woman before him. She's back to staring at the shrine with awed eyes. Being owed isn't something he enjoys. It's with a flashy adjustment of his cloak and a sigh that he speaks. "Girl. How about you tell me about how Kenshin's lived since leaving and then the matter of owing debts will be considered settled." His question is said as a demand instead of a question.

The girl's smile is oddly bright as she begins the story. He supposes he can't really call her a girl since, technically, she's a goddess, but when has he ever cared about that? It was after the baka deshi left that he searched for the shrine of the goddess that asked him to rescue the boy. Only sentimentality convinced him to keep a part of it in his home and place his pottery experiments as offerings.

Sentimentality, not those icky feelings of _caring_. The girl finishes her tale and goes back to examining the shrine. Probably thinking of his baka deshi's people. They must have really cared for her for the carvings to be done so perfectly. He couldn't find a single mistake.

"Baka deshi came here looking to learn the final technique." Kaoru hums affirmatively as she continues to run her fingers over the shrine piece. She can feel the love of her villagers and the happiness from her blessings in each mark. It feels like a painful jagged edge inside of her is being carefully soothed.

Almost like a missing piece is being replaced by a phantom piece. You can't go back, she fiercely remind herself. What's gone is gone. She sighs softly and withdraws from the shrine. Only one of her people still lives, and she will do what she can to provide happiness. Well, two if she counts Hiko. He did make offerings to her shrine.

Yes, he can be one of her's as well, and with that thought comes a bond. It's not as strong as the one that gives her vague impressions of Kenshin's emotions, but it's just strong enough to give her the vague impression of a thought. Passing on the final technique will kill Hiko or Kenshin. Possibly both.

Carefully she feels around her core for any hints of a magic left, and faintly smiles. Hiko looks disturbed by her sudden mood change and she ignores that in favor of placing her hands on Hiko's shoulders. She whispers the blessing and then everything goes dark. Too much strain on her core.

Alarmed, Hiko scrabbles to press fingers to her throat. A few beats too slow but steady. The memories of doing this once before to the twelfth surfaces and Hiko struggles to bury it deeper than before. Some things aren't meant to dwell upon.

"Kaoru?" Hiko grimaces when both the brat and baka drop their buckets of water on his floor. Damn uncoordinated idiots he thinks with a scowl. He retreats back to his seat and downs a bottle of sake after it seems they rush to care for the girl. Hiko begins nursing another bottle of sake thinking about what the whispered blessing.

At least, he thought it was a blessing. It's difficult to say since she spoke in another language. Really, it may have been the same language. He had recognized a few of the words as being archaic versions. "You traveled for ten years as a wanderer. Did it take you that long to understand the reason behind the Hiten Mitsurugi or were you merely trying to atone for what you did as a hitokiri?"

Kenshin's hands paused in inexpertly attending to another's illness as his mouth worked trying to find the words for his answer. "It was both. And because of what I said to you fifteen years ago. I could see people suffering before my eyes-" Hiko cut him off and blew back his cloak in a grand gesture. "Even though you're a baka deshi, you can still talk like a man when it comes time to act."

In a sweeping grand walk to the door, Hiko yelled behind him. "Come with me now! I will pass on the final technique of the Hiten Mitsurugi to you!" A pause at the doorway and he glances at the water remaining on his floor. "The child will stay here and clean up the mess you two caused." Kenshin follows Hiko obediently and only looks back at Kaoru once.

Kaoru sleeps through the Aoiya's battle with the Juppongatana and Kenshin's battle with Shishio. She even sleeps through being moved to the Aoiya, and finally back to the Kamiya dojo. It's when she wakes that she feels the third consequence is far closer than she had realized. At the first moment alone, she draws up a will leaving the dojo to Yahiko so long as he agrees to provide shelter to Sanosuke, Megumi, and Kenshin should they ever be in need for a home.

The third consequence isn't what matters. What matters is that her family and her people are taken care of. Anything that will happen to her is trivial in comparison. Kaoru pauses to think over what loose ends remain.

First she makes a list of dojo instructors that had learned from her father before teaching their own styles. Second she places the scrolls with the succession techniques of the Kamiya Kasshin next to the will. Third she places Kenshin's top in a box and carefully inks his name on it.

Kaoru isn't blind to the way the others seem to be more careful of her. Megumi makes daily visits to change the bloody bandages on her feet. Always muttering when she can't find injuries. Kenshin has washed everything in her home three times a day.

He's also made her so much tea that just the smell of it makes her feel nauseated. She used to _like_ tea. Yahiko pesters her for lessons but refuses to spar with her. Sanosuke constantly brings her sake. Which makes no sense because Kaoru is a _horrible_ drunk. Everyone says so!

At this rate Kaoru is going to go stir crazy and own a sake collection to rival Hiko's. Oh! Quickly she adds a line to her will that all the sake in the house is to be given to Hiko. Kaoru despises being coddled, but walking brings the excruciating pain of knives stabbing into her feet and bone-deep exhaustion. And then Enishi kidnaps her.

The rain is roaring it's rage to match the one that swirls in Kaoru and Enishi's mood sours as it's presence forbidding him to lounge on his favorite rooftop chair. When Kenshin finds his answers in the slum, he returns to their friends -his family- and is given a box with his name delicately inked on the top. The handwriting looks vaguely familiar.

It whispers to him of late nights. Of Tomoe's soft voice teaching someone invisible to her eyes. He ignores the way his shaking fingers lift the lid and his breath stutters upon the sight of his top. "Kaoru's alive." He tells them because he can feel it deep in his bones.

It stops raining when Kaoru sees her family, her people, have come for her. It's with pride that she watches her apprentice win a battle using the succession technique. Never does she doubt Kenshin will win and she notes, as she watches his eyes, that he has no doubt either. Later, when Enishi is in chains, she recognizes Tomoe's diary in Misao's clutches.

Enishi looks at her as though she's an anomaly when she gives it to him. It's on the boat that she can feel the third consequence. You will turn to sea foam for not even you can escape death. "I love you all so much." Her voice startles them from the quiet contentment and awe that had settled over them from a returned loved one.

"We- we love you too Kaoru." Megumi chokes out with a dawning horror. Kaoru smiles at her in a way she hopes is reassuring, and she leans back. Purposefully dropping off the side of the boat. Her body turns to foam before hitting the water.

The rag-tag family returns victorious, but without the beloved woman they had gone to claim. And life moves on without her.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Death makes its way to the afterlife with a purpose in mind. The rains have stopped obeying the gods, all but demanding Kaoru be returned to it. While Death does not have the power to create a goddess or give a goddess a purpose, on this occasion it is merely a messenger. Kaoru accepts without hesitation and now she is a strong goddess of the rain instead of the weak goddess she had been before.

To humans in Tokyo, she looks like a woman dressed in fine silk robes with blue-tinted black hair. She ignores the stares and walks through winding streets to reach the Kamiya dojo. Carefully she knocks on the large wooden doors and Yahiko answers. "Are you the current master of the Kamiya dojo?" Yahiko's eyes are narrowed at her as he responds. "Yes. What about it?" Kaoru gives an indulgent smile that she knows will irritate him. "I would like to spar with you."

They walk through the courtyard to the dojo, and Kaoru is pleased to see Kenshin still lives in the home. Even though he's doing laundry again. Really the man should find more than laundry pleasing. "She's here for a spar." Kenshin's head cocks curiously. "Oro?" She almost smiles from nostalgia.

This time there is only one consequence. She cannot tell them who she is. But that doesn't mean that she can't beat it into Yahiko with a bokken. Yahiko lasts almost half an hour before she pulls the succession technique out successfully. He's almost strong enough to give her a run for her money. Almost.

"...Kaoru?" The look in Yahiko's eyes is part pleading and part hope, and she doesn't have to look at Kenshin to see his reaction. She can feel his anticipation from where she stands. "Of course Little Yahiko." As Yahiko shouts about being called little, she grins at Kenshin mischievously and taps once.

Finally, Kaoru is home.


	6. A boy and his goddess part 1

_**Ok, so this is actually posted as a series on ao3, and I didn't want to break guidelines for so I decided it would probably be best to post it here as an add-on for the story :)**_

 _ **Directory:**_

 _ **Kaoru's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 1- A little goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 2- A little goddess part 2**_

 _ **Chapter 3- A little goddess part 3**_

 _ **Chapter 4- A little goddess part 4**_

 _ **Chapter 5- A little goddess part 5 (End)**_

 _ **Kenshin's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 6- A boy and his goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 7- A boy and his goddess part 2 (End)**_

Shinta is born on a rainy day. A bad omen, the midwife said, until she saw downy tufts of reddish hair and blue eyes flecked with violet. "It's best to give this child to the forest. It could only be a child of an oni with that coloring." Instead, his mother forces the woman to leave and lays back on her bedding. Gently she pulls her child to her chest, and smiles when his eyes seem to focus on her face.

She has lost a husband as well as her other babes which makes this one a tiny miracle. He is perfect in every way from the tips of his little toes to the fluffy red down on his head. A few days later, she takes her child to the shrine and almost stumbles on the stairs. Her legs are still weak from childbirth but she refuses to succumb to weakness. It's with a sigh of relief that she seats herself on a low step of the shrine.

Her smile almost falters when she sees the telltale swirls of water announcing her goddess' approach. She had known that she wouldn't be able to see her anymore, but a stubborn part of her still hoped. Ignoring the loss, she lowers her son to the water and lays him on the top. There is not a single moment of hesitance. She is secure in the knowledge that he won't be hurt by the water of their goddess.

After she watches her son almost levitate above the water, she whispers. "Shinta. His name is Shinta." Shinta seems to jerk sharply and she forces herself not to do anything other than to smile. It seems their goddess realized that she couldn't be seen. She ignores the sense of loss and instead focuses on the joy. Sight is a small price to pay for her son to be born kicking and screaming instead of still and cold.

A few years later, Shinta comes to her and draws in the dirt instead of speaking. "What's wrong Shinta?" He refuses to look at her. Instead he almost whispers his response. "They didn't want to play with me because I look funny. Why do I have to have red hair?" She sits next to him and stares into her lap. "I had lost your father and siblings. When you had stopped moving, I thought I would lose you too. I begged for the goddess' blessing and then you were born. Perfect from the tips of your little toes to the top of your red hair.'

Shinta's tone is pleading. "But why is my hair red?" She reaches to run her fingers through his hair. "It marks you as one beloved by our goddess." Shinta looks away from her so she sighs and watches him for a moment. Instead of coddling, she resorts to the same method her parents used when she was little.

The technique of distraction works wonders as she presents a small spinning top to him. The small top had been hers when she was a child and she liked the idea of always being with him. Even if it was through a small toy. Shinta walks and admires his new top. Maybe the kids will play with him if he shares his top?

Instead, they react with horror at the idea of playing with him. One even yells at him while running off with the others. "Only oni have red hair. I'm not playing with an oni." Dejected, he tries hard not to cry and looks for somewhere to spin his top. Shinta settles on a flat rock by the river to play but, only a few seconds after spinning, the top flies off into the river.

Tears burn the back of his eyes as he realizes it's far too deep for him to retrieve. He stares with wide eyes when the top floats from the water and spins itself merrily on the rock. Something that's not even possible. His eyes dart back to the river and he thinks back to what his mother spoke of a goddess she had once been able to see. "Goddess?"

Then he can only see blue eyes and hair so black it's almost blue. She looks as excited to see him as he is to see her. He holds the top out to her and that's all it takes for her to start playing with him. Shinta comes to see her every day after that. He even makes up games for her to play with him since she can't be on land.

Eventually she speaks to him. "You know… everyone in my village has made a wish. Except you. Did you want to make one? I might be able to grant it." Shinta's face burns and he ducks his head. There is only one thing that he wants most in the world. "A person who doesn't think I'm an oni. One that would be friends with me."  
She looks devastated as she whispers to him. "One day. One day you'll have one." Shinta thrusts his pinkie in her face. "Pinkie promise?" The goddess seals the deal as she wraps her larger pinkie finger around his. "Pinkie promise."

Traders came to their village and did some small trades with them for a few days. Enough for his mother to ask he stay home to help her with making a few more baskets. Then people started getting sick. His mother doesn't suffer long from the disease, but refuses to allow him near her during this time of illness. "Take food and go to the shrine Shinta. I don't want you to get sick too."

Shinta waits alone in the shrine for days before he hears something dragging itself from the water up the shrine steps. She doesn't make it into the shrine before he's clinging to her sobbing. It doesn't take long for him to notice the goddess is translucent. Something that she had never been before. After a while, he quiets and whispers to her. "Goddess, are you leaving me too?"

She smiles sadly at him. "Only after you stop believing that I exist. Only then." They both fall asleep still holding onto each other. Shinta is woken by coarse words and rough hands that drag him away from his goddess. Her eyes are wide in her face and her teeth are bared at the men. However, men cannot fear a goddess so weak she's unable to protect a child. They don't even begin to believe in her presence even as Shinta reaches for her.

"He'll probably fetch an ok price. Everyone wants a child. They're the easiest to train when they're young." Shinta screams for her as they pull him away. Her rain pours from the skies and he watches as she struggles towards him on trembling arms. The last thing he sees is her face before passing out.

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Shinta is terrified and grieving for the first few days of travel. The girls, his fellow slaves, don't accuse him of being an oni or mistreat him because of his red hair. One even pets his hair softly and watches him play with his top. Black and blue tease his peripheral vision as they continue to travel. He looks each time with raised hopes that the goddess has come for him, only for them to be dashed when she's nowhere to be seen.

Then bandits stream from the mountains and slaughter his new friends even as they surround him pleading for his life. The rain pours so hard it seems to scream with them, and then there is a large man with an even larger white cloak. The bandits never have time to scream. He disposes of them dispassionately and stares at the small boy with a displeased frown.

The man, Hiko Seijirou, had been plagued by dreams that promised him an apprentice in exchange for saving the life of a child. This runt is not an apprentice. The boy is barely large enough to hold a kitchen knife much less a sword. Although... The runt is staring at him with fearless surprise. Steady nerves this one, but still… This brat isn't worthy of being his apprentice.

Shinta is faintly surprised when the man tells him where to go for safety and shelter. It's still a distant sensation when he's left alone in a blood soaked field. Numbly, he stares at the bodies before slowly reaching for something to dig graves. Shinta doesn't notice the rain has stopped, that his hands are bleeding, or the flashes of black and blue in his peripheral.

In such a short time, he has lost his mother, his home, his goddess, and new friends. When he can no longer dig, he curls up on the graves to sleep as he grieves before digging again. Hiko continues to have dreams that practically demand him to take the boy as his apprentice. Finally, the dreams prod him into at least checking the village for the boy. Only… only he finds the boy never made it there.

Brat must have killed himself. Well, he can hardly blame the boy. Grown men would probably have a hard time stomaching the bloodshed, much less a child. It's only with one purpose that he heads back up the mountain, and it's to bury the dead there. Except, instead of bodies, he finds the boy finishing up grave digging.

This time he studies the boy's personality. Digging graves for the murderers of his friends, those who would have sold him, and for the women -girls they were only girls not even old enough to be women- who had protected him to the best of their abilities displays a certain inner strength. The child radiates a certain kindness and a fierce need to protect.

Except for his name and size, he's a good candidate for apprenticeship. A flash of black and blue appears at the furthest corner of his vision when he renames the boy. A strong name like Kenshin can only help the boy grow up stronger. He eyes the boy when taking him home. What strange coloring…

Kenshin trains hard and learns to ignore the flashes of black and blue. His goddess is gone, his friends are gone, his mother is gone, and his home is gone. All that is left, is to move on. Hiko seems content to beat it into him. It isn't until Kenshin doubts that his goddess ever existed that he realizes his mistake.

A translucent woman lays propped up against a tree that overlooks Hiko's cabin. Kenshin watches as the woman with blue eyes and blue-black hair stops staring off into space before seemingly focusing on something in front of her. She blinks slowly before her lips curl into a smile. And then she fades away like dust to the wind.

Uncomprehending, he stares at the spot the woman faded away. A slow dawning horror chills his body and his eyes dart to Hiko, who is also staring at the spot. 'Only until you stop believing I exist. Only then.' And he had doubted. Which killed her.

This time, Kenshin doesn't react to Hiko's goads. Hiko eyes the boy after the third day he refuses to eat. Brat. Hiko supposes he could understand, but this would be a disgraceful end to his first apprentice... It's with a gusty sigh that he develops a plan. The next day, he's left an older woman from the village in charge of his idiot brat of an apprentice.

A few days later, he finds himself in the ruins of what had been a small beautiful village. It's not until Hiko sees the shrine for himself that he realizes what has been lost from the world. Each piece had been lovingly hewn without a single imperfection. Never had he seen a shrine with this much care and devotion, but he had seen a woman with blue eyes and black-blue hair fade away with a smile. A stray thought from… Was it a book or another random fact his master had always been spouting off? 'Gods of the sea cannot exist on land without severe pain due to being cut off from the sea.'

When he returns home and shoos the old woman back to the village, Kenshin is eating small amounts. Hiko assembles pieces that he took of the shrine into a smaller version of it and slaps it into a corner before grumbling at Kenshin. "There you idiot apprentice. Now she has a grave too so get over it, go outside, and swing five-thousand times."

He most certainly didn't get hives from wide violet eyes. A few years later found him still with the idiot apprentice who was -surprise surprise- still an idiot. The brat also seemed to be forever child-sized. Kenshin thought about his goddess each time he saw the shrine that doubled as her grave. So long ago, she had promised him a friend that wouldn't think of him as an oni. Did she ever realize that she had been that friend?

In the end, she had taught him to be tolerant and to protect without ever meaning to do so. One night, after several bottles of alcohol, Hiko mentions dreams from a goddess that told him to rescue a child and teach said child swordsmanship. 'Teach him to protect with the sword.' Kenshin watched Hiko pause after that phrase, seemingly far away, and chug down another bottle before ranting about something he apparently considered equally appalling. However, Kenshin didn't hear another word after learning of her will for him to protect with the sword.

Kenshin fights with his master later that month, convinced his mission to save as many lives as possible is far more important than finishing his training or heeding Hiko's word.

He joins the Ishin Shishi, and suddenly Kenshin no longer exists.

Instead, there is only Hitokiri Battousai.

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Hitokiri Battosai fights without mercy or kindness. Only after the fighting is done does he offer silent prayers for them. Regret is the one thing he feels, and before it can overwhelm him, he shoves it to the deepest place. It's for a better world, he tells himself. Good will come of this bloodshed.

Except…. It feels like an excuse or a justification. So he can wash the blood all he wants but it'll never come off. Hair dyed red from the blood of his victims people whisper. Too fast and too ruthless to be human, and he begins to forget he ever was. An oni, the children had called him so long ago.

Perhaps his mother had been wrong about his red hair marking him as beloved by their goddess. All he saw was how the others were silently terrified and the blood on his hands. Hitokiri Battosai can feel himself dying by inches with each slaughter by his blade. And then, he sees a girl in white sleep clothes walk by and almost stops himself from proceeding with his mission. Only one thing holds his attention and it's the look in blue eyes -the same shade as his goddess from all those years ago- when his target walks through her. Rough hands, blue eyes wide with rage, and screams of his name flash through his mind at the sight of the girl's reaction.

It's the madness of a hitokiri that rises up and takes over. Red hot anger has seared his bones and forced him to react without thought. Only after he watches her lips form his name, does he come back to himself. Disgusted and horrified with the madness slowly infiltrating his mind, he whispers part of his prayers.

Only to his goddess does he pray. The sound of the cleanup crew startles him enough to realize this is not real. Can't be real. So he walks aimlessly until he reaches the inn and finds himself scrubbing blood from his hands until fingers wrap around his wrist. Small delicate fingers that can't be real because he knows those eyes that come with them.

He watched others walk through the owner of these fingers. She's not real. Can't be real because he watched her die by his own fault. It's the shock of feeling warmth around his wrist that has him pulling away from them. This time he notices the girl following him and stifles an amused chuckle when she realizes where, exactly, she has followed him.

The look on her face as she trots outside of the men's washroom is that of embarrassed horror. It's not until after she leaves that he realizes he has yet to inquire as to her purpose in following him to the hideout. For a scarce moment, he considers the loyalty he owes to Katsura would require him to report that he had been followed.

But… then what would he say? An invisible girl followed me to our base of operations? Katsura would think him mad or worse… he would believe him and ask the girl to spy on the Shinsengumi. No, he decides. She will remain unknown to all. He steps outside clean and again stifles an amused chuckle at the sight of the girl with her eyes squeezed tightly shut.

Her hands pressed to them for good measure as though they may betray her any given moment. Hitokiri Battosai gently tugs her fingers away and ends up jumping back in response to when she flails wildly before falling over. What a clumsy thing, he thinks, as he pulls her up onto her feet. Footsteps echo through the halls and he's suddenly reminded they're not alone.

"Come." It's a rude demand but she follows him anyway. Battosai closes the shoji behind her and settles into his normal spot for the night's sleep. It was strategically chosen to be close to the window should the inn be invaded. He winces inside even as he says it. "Explain."

He supposes he deserves the dark look she gives him after making single worded demands. Somewhere in the middle of that thought he realizes she has yet to say a word, and he could slap himself for not realizing that sooner. "Can you speak?" Settling across from him, the girl shakes her head no and taps the floor twice. "Are you alive?"

Nodding this time, she taps the floor once. "One tap for yes and two for no?" This time, she taps the floor once sharply. Battosai stares at her at a loss for words only for a moment. "Are you a god?" And at this question, it seems as though her eyes are far older than he could ever dream of being. A weariness seems to drape over the girl and she stares blankly for a moment before continuing.

Slowly she taps the floor twice, pauses, and taps once more. "Is that a maybe?" Two taps this time. "...Were you a god at one time?" Blue eyes seem to pierce through him before she gives him her reply. One tap.

"Do you know me? I mean, you did sort of say my name…" Raw unfiltered grief flashes across her face for only a moment before she holds out her hand. He stares at her hand for a long moment, unsure of what she wants, and she starts tracing characters on his hand. Irritation boils over inside of him after this point until she draws a picture of his mother on scrap paper. Battosai had almost forgotten what she looked like, and suddenly he feels far too old in his skin. "Why are you here?"

He should have expected the girl to look at him with grief at this question. As though she thought he would know without asking. The hitokiri definitely didn't expect her arms to awkwardly reel him into a hug. He hadn't been hugged since… The thought trails off as he tries to remember and he's not surprised that he can't remember the last hug. There's something profound in a kind touch from another.

It's only when she starts to pull away that he realizes he's not ready for it to end. So he drifts off with a small warm body in his arms, and wakes in a better mood than he had been in a long time. Soon, he learns the girl only appears at night when he's doing his work. A few small rules, and several dark looks from her during the creation of these rules, he finds himself spinning his top with her.

He knows she's far older than him because he can see it in her eyes. However, he can't help but want to treat her as he did his goddess. It's with a great sense of deja vu that he watches her pick up his top and spin it for him. Battosai pretends his fingers aren't shaking when he plays spinning top with her for the rest of the night.

Hitokiri Battosai has gotten used to coming home to his small room in the inn. He has gotten used to a small warm body seated next to him when he sleeps. And perhaps... Perhaps this is why he doesn't kill a drunk woman and instead brings her to the inn.

Perhaps he's not just Hitokiri Battosai anymore.

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Himura Battosai felt strange walking through the inn the first few days. The woman, Tomoe, had made herself at home working in the inn. The men that had previously recoiled or blanched at the sight of him, started to make…. Comments about him and Tomoe. Things that made his face feel as red as his hair until he reacted in embarrassment.

It was as though bringing Tomoe home had made him seem human instead of being a murderous wraith walking through the halls of the inn, but the mere sight of his anger had them paling and making pitiful excuses. Tomoe sleeps in his room with a twitch of her lips that spoke of displeasure, but speaks gracious words. Himura Battosai almost bitterly notes her surprise at him sleeping against the wall instead of trying to share the futon.

Like the others, she too is convinced he's a monster. He stares at the permanent blood on his hands listening to her breathing level out when she drifts off. Little Goddess should be coming soon. What will she have to say about this classically beautiful woman taking up his futon? Himura Battosai can't look at her as he mutters. "It's not what it looks like. She's just a drunk that saw me kill someone and I didn't want to kill her."

He's prepared for a teasing smirk or a knowing smile. What he's not prepared for is for her to quietly sit next to him softly smiling at nothing. Somehow, sleep comes quickly for him that night.

The more time he spends with Tomoe, the more he finds himself becoming attached. Even Little Goddess seems attached to her, and perhaps that's what motivates him to go out of his way to be kind to Tomoe. She's a hard-working and soft spoken woman. Spending time with her is like spending time with Little Goddess. He feels… human with them.

During the inn's raid, he half hopes that Little Goddess doesn't come tonight and half hopes Tomoe is safe. It's only after she's safe that he can slip back into being Hitokiri Battosai. Even then, it is difficult to fit himself completely into the role. It's even more difficult to remain emotionless.

So he takes off after his colleagues instead of continuing the fighting, and suddenly everything changes. Katsura tells him to go into hiding with Tomoe as his wife, and he's back in a small village trying to make a house into a home. For the mission of course. Not because he's slowly and yet so quickly falling in love with Tomoe.

Everything feels like a dream. A dream that he would like to have every night if only Little Goddess would stop avoiding them. Kenshin hasn't figured out what to do about her wandering around doing random chores and scurrying away at the sight of them until he wakes from yet another dream of blue eyes. Except his time he remembers a goddess in a small village with blue-black hair, fierce blue eyes, and a long scaled tail that would play spinning top with him when the other children refused.

Kenshin waits until the next night before hunting down Little Goddess, and he finds her sprawled out on a hill overlooking his home. Walking closer allows him to see how she stares at the stars in wonder. So instead of quickening his pace, he slows and sits next to her quietly. It seems a crime to break the peace, so he speaks quietly while toying with the top in his sleeve.

"You're the goddess from my village aren't you?" She smiles faintly and continues to stare at the stars. Kenshin doesn't need her to confirm what he already knows, and slowly pulls out his top. He stares at the scratches and flaking paint before pressing it into her hands. "You kept your promise of giving me a friend. It's my offering to you." She slowly turns it and he can see the grief and contentment warring on her face.

Ever so gently, she wraps his fingers around the top and smiles at him. Kenshin waits a few more hours until walking back into his home, and Tomoe looks up questioningly from the repair she's doing on a sleeve. Instead of an answer she sees a genuine smile on his face. He falls asleep quickly in his spot against the wall.

It's with a trembling sigh that Tomoe sets aside her sewing and stares at the man responsible for her fiance's death. The Battosai, the man who murdered people so quickly they had no chance to defend themselves, rumored to be a demon who's hair was dyed red from the blood of it's victims seemed more like an innocent. It's not right she thinks. It's not right for the man she was sent to deceive to be this person.

She had grown so used to thinking of him as the man who stole her happiness, and yet now here he is providing her with it. Tomoe cannot forget the rain of blood. She cannot forget the sweet shy smiles the Battosai, Kenshin, gives her. She cannot forget her fiance, but… She can forgive.

So she does, and allows herself to live in this sweet dream.

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	7. A boy and his goddess part 2 (End)

_**Directory:**_

 _ **Kaoru's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 1- A little goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 2- A little goddess part 2**_

 _ **Chapter 3- A little goddess part 3**_

 _ **Chapter 4- A little goddess part 4**_

 _ **Chapter 5- A little goddess part 5 (End)**_

 _ **Kenshin's side of the tale**_

 _ **Chapter 6- A boy and his goddess part 1**_

 _ **Chapter 7- A boy and his goddess part 2 (End)**_

Kenshin admits he loves both Tomoe and Little Goddess. In different ways of course. Little Goddess accepts him. She accepts every part of him, even the dark parts that he's scared of sharing with Tomoe. That is something he will not take for granted, and he treasures every moment.

Tomoe makes him feel at peace. When he's with her, he dreams of a world where he could have been a farmer and she his wife. They could have married in front of the goddess' shrine in the traditional way of his village. The two of them would walk the winding steps in traditional white robes on a sunny day.

If their marriage was well fated, the Goddess would send a gentle rain. Then, they would go home and live happily together. Each child they had would be blessed by the goddess. As well as their children's children. Kenshin yearns for that dream to come true one day, and knows the impossibility of it all.

As days fly by, Tomoe finally asks him about why chores are done overnight. Kenshin confides in her about his village and how the villagers died from Cholera except for him. He tells her of the Goddess of Rain that faded away and reappeared as Little Goddess. Tomoe doesn't interrupt and he can see how she struggles to believe him.

He smiles when she takes the leap of faith and walks outside at night. It's the weeds plucking themselves from the ground and landing in neat piles that convince her, but it takes her a few nights to speak to the 'Little Goddess'. Kenshin really needs to give her a better name. She places ink and paper next to one of the weed piles and takes a few calming breaths before speaking. "What are you?"

Tomoe winces inwardly. That wasn't the question she planned to ask. Instead of answers, she's greeted with horribly written answers so vague she may as well haven't asked. Despite this, she keeps trying for several nights until she can no longer look at that awful calligraphy. So the routine changes to nightly lessons.

At night Little Goddess practices characters, Tomoe writes in her diary, and Kenshin leans against the wall and watches them. Eventually he asks Tomoe to teach him how to read, and sleeps through a few of Tomoe's lessons with Little Goddess. "What do you want for Kenshin?" She asks that question and feels the weight of unseen eyes on her. Tomoe feels like a child pinned under Little Goddess' gaze until she looks away.

The brush floats in the air for several moments before touching paper. "What I want for Kenshin, is only his happiness. He is happy here instead of fighting. However, he has taken blood onto his hands with the singular goal of making the world a better place and so he won't stay happy here. Eventually, he'll have to go back and finish what he started. If he doesn't, then all the killing was for nothing." She stares at the paper before the brush moves to add the final piece. "I think Kenshin would want nothing more than to protect people without killing."

When Little Goddess disappears, Tomoe is still staring at her diary contemplating what she read and slips the Little Goddess' paper between her diary pages. Then the dream comes to an end. The group Tomoe joined, when she wanted the Battosai dead for what he did to Akira, found their home and her brother showed up only to reveal he had also joined them. Enishi, the sweet toddler who followed her around had a mad light to his eyes.

Had her quest for vengeance ruined his sanity? It only adds to her guilt. That night, Little Goddess doesn't come and Kenshin joins her on the futon as husband. Tomoe waits until he falls deeply asleep and takes the chance to write in her diary. Her diary and a letter are all she leaves him when she slips away.

This is my penance she thinks. For failing Akira and loving his murderer. For loving Kenshin and failing him as well. Penance for failing Enishi. She'll be with Akira again and Enishi is a smart enterprising boy. He'll be fine. As one final action, she whispers a prayer to Little Goddess for Kenshin. May you be there for him in this time of death. Then she walks to where death awaits with sure steps and a strong spine.

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Kenshin walks with Tomoe's scarf. He doesn't care about the men that die and he doesn't care about his wounds. Only Tomoe matters right now. Tomoe with her dark eyes and calm demeanor and her small smiles. So each time he crumples to the snow laden ground, he gets back up. Each time it looks as though he'll lose, he wins.

So when the last opponent falls, he blinks the blood from his eyes and discovers why his blade feels heavier. Tomoe and the man crumple. Kenshin grabs Tomoe and gathers her closely. Not Tomoe. Not her. He can't near to lose her like the others or, worse, be responsible for her death.

Tomoe struggles to whisper comforting words, but her body feels like lead. Suddenly Little Goddess is there, next to Kenshin. At least… she thinks it's Little Goddess as she takes a moment to study eyes too old for a child's face. Then, Tomoe draws her dagger across Kenshin's face to cancel her fiance's curse and remind him that he's not alone. It takes effort, but she smiles at both of them. She feels peace as she whispers to them. "It's alright… So please don't cry…"

Tomoe slowly blinks once before she sinks into death's embrace. Kenshin sobs out entreaties to Tomoe's body before turning to Little Goddess. "Can't you do something?" Her eyes to an empty space above Tomoe's body only for her face to fall in disappointment. Little Goddess taps Kenshin's shoulder twice before placing her fingers over his hand.

Kenshin jerks away from her touch. He can't right now. He can't be around her because he doesn't want to blame her for not being able to save Tomoe. "Don't touch me. Just- just go away. Leave me alone." Kenshin presses his lips to Tomoe's hair just as he feels Little Goddess snatch the top out of his sleeve.

He only asked her to go away. She didn't need to snatch things from his sleeve, so he turns to snap at her only to stare in slow dawning horror. "Wha- No. No, I didn't mean it. Please not you too…" Little Goddess is translucent and tears slip from her eyes as she fades even further. Soon, there's nothing left of her. Kenshin wraps himself tighter around Tomoe's body and screams. No one is there to hear.

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Kenshin is alone in this world. Tomoe is buried and Little Goddess is gone. After a few nights of waiting for her to appear, he turns to Tomoe's diary. Reading the diary is hard, and he starts at the end to try getting it over with sooner. She had written in elegant strokes on top of pages filled with a child-like scrawl. 'I asked Little Goddess what she wanted for you husband.' As he read Little Goddess' answer, the words 'protect people without killing' resonate.

Quietly, he sets Little Goddess' answers to the side, finishes Tomoe's diary, and stares at the house he'd thought of as home. They had wanted so little of him and so much for him. Atonement, no more deaths, and happiness… At the very least he could give them two out of the three.

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Ten years is a long time to wander. Ten years of not killing and atoning for his crimes. When he meets a girl with fierce blue eyes that almost seem too old and too innocent for her face, he can't help but think of Little Goddess. She even asked for his real name instead of flinching away at the title Battosai. "I want you, the wanderer-"

Those words are enough to have him agree a thousand times over. Just a little while, he promises himself. "Kenshin." He tells her, and doesn't miss how her eyes widen in recognition. Little Goddess? No. Firmly he stuffs the hope down. She's gone, and this one won't be a replacement for her.

Kaoru-dono is a girl with a temper and runs a dojo with no students. So, he brings her Yahiko, a student in the form of a malnourished orphan who shouts insults as protection. Then, a fighter for hire soon begins to half-live in Kaoru-dono's dojo, and somehow brings a fox woman with him. Megumi-san is… complicated. Kenshin isn't sure if she's truly trying to flirt with him, or if she does it for the way Kaoru-dono reacts.

Slowly, each of them notice something odd about Kaoru-dono. "Hey Kenshin, you ever notice when Missy is enraged beyond reason it rains so hard you can't see your own hand?" He stares at the rain instead of responding to Sano. Sano seems to take that as agreement, and they both stand on the porch waiting for the rain to die off before going back inside the dojo.

Yahiko attaches himself to Kaoru-dono and yet tries to push her away with insults. He and Megumi toss barbed insults at Lit-, no Kaoru-dono, and Kenshin finds himself irritated on some days. It's not until Yahiko and Megumi walk in on her changing the blood-soaked bandages wrapped around her feet that they both change to fond jabs.

That day, Yahiko is pale and his hands shake as he watches Megumi interrogate Kaoru-dono. "Are you hurt? Is it infected? How long has this been going on?" Kenshin watches Kaoru smile faintly from the doorway. "Only a year or two. I'm not injured, it's just something that happens." Megumi's lips thin as she wipes away blood, and examines Kaoru-dono's feet. She glances at Yahiko and Kenshin sharply from the corner of her eyes. "I need to do a full examination. You two need to leave."

When the shoji shuts, Yahiko is white as parchment. "Yahiko, why don't you go clean the dojo as a surprise for Kaoru-dono? I'm sure it would make her happy." The distraction will be good for Yahiko, he thinks. He can see his own fear reflected in Yahiko's eyes. Is Kaoru dying? Dr. Gensai didn't seem concerned, but Megumi seems so alarmed… Laundry, he decides, is the best way not to think. So Kenshin does laundry until Megumi sits next to him. "I don't understand. It doesn't make any sense medically."

He carefully hangs clothing to dry searching for words. "She doesn't seem to be suffering, and her appetite is still strong. Surely those are good signs." Megumi startles when Yahiko speaks behind her. Kenshin always forgets that others don't know when someone is coming up behind them. "Busu isn't dying right?" His eyes search Megumi's face. "I- I don't have cause to believe that she is dying."

Yahiko stares at Megumi for a long moment with an expression far too old for a child his age. He walks into the dojo without saying another word. A few moments later, Kenshin hears cleaning start again and settles back into washing laundry.

Days and adventures pass. Kenshin is suddenly struck with the knowledge that he has a new family. A makeshift family held together by one Kamiya Kaoru of the Kasshin Style. It's both terrifying and thrilling to think about. It's also one of the reasons why he can't stay when Shishio surfaces for revenge against the government. He cannot paint a target on them, and they're safer staying in Tokyo. So on the 14th of May, Kenshin bids Kaoru farewell and allows himself a single hug before disappearing into the darkness.

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During long hours of silence, he comes to a conclusion about what Kaoru-dono is. Gods and goddesses are children of something such as sun and life. Surely Little Goddess was a child of the rain. Therefore there have to be more. So perhaps Kaoru-dono is another goddess asked to watch over him. He won't allow himself to consider the alternative.

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Why is she here? He thinks this with mingled anger and relief when she appears in Hiko's home. In an effort to control himself, he doesn't look back at her and Yahiko. "Kaoru? Kaoru please talk to me. Just tell me what's wrong." The panic in Yahiko's voice drains him of anger, and Kenshin whips his eyes to Kaoru-dono. She's pale, thinner, and stroking her fingers over his goddess' shrine. Desperately, he shoves away his hope. Little Goddess was a nothing more than a wisp of a ghost when he told her to leave.

She's gone and isn't coming back. Did Kaoru not eat anything after he left? He's shocked when she throws herself into a bow. "Baka deshi, take the boy and fetch some water." Kenshin bites back the urge to argue when the murderous ki washes over them and instead leaves with Yahiko. It's not until they reach the stream that Yahiko speaks. "Kaoru's going to be fine with him isn't she?" He takes a few breaths before responding to Yahiko. "He's not dangerous to her. Why were you so panicked when you came inside?"

Yahiko's knuckles are white and he stares at the water. "It was like she wasn't there the entire way here. She's been staring at water and walked all the way here without saying a word or asking for directions. And in Tokyo…" The words seem to catch in his throat. A shaky exhale and he tries again. "In Tokyo she mostly stayed in bed, limped around when out of bed, and couldn't keep food or tea down."

Kenshin has to strain to catch what Yahiko whispers. "I was hoping she would get better coming here. Megumi was too." He scrubs his sleeves over his eyes jerkily. "We can only wait and see, Yahiko." The walk back is silent save for the soft sloshing of water. Both of them drop their buckets on Master's floor at the sight of Kaoru lying prone on the floor and Kenshin cringes inwardly. He can see the vein on Master's forehead throb at the sight of water, but ignores the imbedded reaction in favor of rushing to Kaoru's side.

"You traveled for ten years as a wanderer. Did it take you that long to understand the reason behind the Hiten Mitsurugi or were you merely trying to atone for what you did as a hitokiri?" Kenshin's hands paused in inexpertly attending to another's illness as his mouth worked trying to find the words for his answer. "It was both. And because of what I said to you fifteen years ago. I could see people suffering before my eyes-" Hiko cut him off and blew back his cloak in a grand gesture. "Even though you're a baka deshi, you can still talk like a man when it comes time to act."

In a sweeping grand walk to the door, Hiko yelled behind him. "Come with me now! I will pass on the final technique of the Hiten Mitsurugi to you!" A pause at the doorway and he glances at the water remaining on his floor. "The child will stay here and clean up the mess you two caused." Kenshin follows Hiko obediently and only allows himself to look back at Kaoru once.

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Before heading to battle, in a rare moment absent of both Hiko and Yahiko, Kenshin is startled to hear Kaoru murmur in her sleep. "Here… Kenshin… 'M here. Promise..." The icy block lodged in his throat melts from unexpected warmth. He stops himself from touching her, but can't stop the words escaping from him. "I know. I'll come back." Kaoru stays asleep through the battles, and even being transported back home to the dojo. The only reason why any of them keep their sanity is because she looks content in her sleep with a small smile toying with the corners of her mouth.

The first thing Kenshin does when Megumi clears him for moving about, is laundry. He cleans everything multiple times. When Kaoru-dono wakes, she asks for paper and quiet. Kenshin knows he may have gone overboard when she cringes at the sight of tea, but notes that she has a stack of papers and a box set off to the side tucked between miniature mountains of sake. He shares worried glances with Sano, Megumi, and Yahiko each time they see Kaoru's shaky steps.

They've taken every available moment to treasure time with her. Yahiko is demanding she teach him lessons from the sidelines, Megumi has bags under her eyes from visiting so much, and Sano keeps bringing sake. He knows Sano means well, but sake isn't going to make Kaoru bond with him. A drunk Kaoru-dono is a crazed maniac.

Kaoru doesn't get better, and Tomoe's brother appears bringing up several feelings best left alone. She doesn't flinch away when he tells them of his past. Kaoru even greets him normally the next day, and then they all stand together on the day of Enishi's attack. Smoke obscures his vision of Kaoru for only a few minutes. When it clears, Kaoru is pinned to the dojo wall by a sword.

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Little Goddess, Tomoe, and now…. Now Kaoru is gone as well. What use is this sword when it can't protect those he loves the most? He feels as though he's walking through water and pays no heed to the voices of those calling him. So when Kenshin finds himself in a village of outcasts slumped over his chained sword, and cannot bring himself to wonder why his sword is wrapped in chains. He can't care anymore. It hurts too much.

Sano comes eventually speaking of revenge and taking down those who had wronged Kaoru. Even the punch Sano throws doesn't penetrate the litany in his head. Tired. Hurts too much. I can't- No more. Please. When Yahiko comes, it's to plead for help. It's almost enough to force himself to move. Almost enough. In the end, it's Tomoe who gives him the clues and he breaks his chains.

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Yahiko stares at him hard during a rare lucid moment when Kenshin visits him in his sickbed. Megumi doesn't look at him as she binds Yahiko's wounds. "Kaoru left you that box." His eyes follow Yahiko's fingers pointing by the door, and his mind stutters at the sight of a scrawl reminding him of a paper tucked between the pages of Tomoe's diary.

It whispers to him of late nights. Of Tomoe's soft voice teaching someone invisible to her eyes. He ignores the way his shaking fingers lift the lid and his breath stutters upon the sight of his top. Kenshin traces the scratches and looks at the faded and flaked paint. Little Goddess is Kaoru. He wants to laugh from relief, but instead he speaks. "Kaoru's alive." It's true. He can feel it deep in his bones.

Kaoru looks thin and worn, but they can see her watching them battle with a smile. Kenshin doesn't doubt that he'll win and take Kaoru back home. Even when it looks as though Enishi will win. Kenshin has never been so tired, and it's all he can do to keep his eyes open after he wins. When he looks to Kaoru, he can see her eyes are focused on the diary in Misao's arms. Had he any doubt of her being Little Goddess, it would have shriveled up and died the moment she took the diary to Enishi.

Enishi looks at her as though she's an anomaly when she gives it to him before boarding the boat. It's not until they're seated and he's resisting the urge to lean against her that she speaks. "I love you all so much." Her voice startles them from the quiet contentment and awe that had settled over them from a returned loved one. Kenshin can't help but stare when he notices her body becoming translucent.

"We- we love you too Kaoru." Megumi chokes out with horror blooming on her features. Kaoru smiles fondly, leans back, and falls off the side of the boat. They scrabble to the side of the boat in time to see her body turn to foam before hitting the water. Kenshin feels as though the ground has been yanked from beneath him, and notices a soft keening noise. A glance at the others forces him to realize that it's coming from himself. He welcomes when everything goes dark.

Megumi can feel her lips tremble as she realizes that, yet again, she was unable to tell Kaoru how much she meant to her. From the corner of her eye, she can see devastation written across Yahiko's face. Some tender part of her forces her to reach out to try and comfort him, but he flinches away from her. "I'm not a child." The rest of the boat ride continues in grief tainted silence.

Megumi is increasingly concerned when Kenshin sleeps for weeks and hopes for him to wake soon so he can do something about Yahiko. Yahiko is wandering the halls late at night and is always pausing outside of Kaoru's room. What Megumi didn't expect was for Kenshin to push food away when he awoke. She's just lost Kaoru and Sano's on the run from the law. Now is she to lose Kenshin too? He can see the thoughts written across her face. She doesn't understand that he just needs time alone right now. Kenshin just needs time to grieve.

When soft whimpering noises wake him late at night, he stands on shaky legs to walk to Yahiko's room. It's not until arms are wrapped around him that he realizes something important. Yahiko needs him to be strong right now. There's no time to grieve. Carefully, a bit awkwardly too, he places his arms around the boy and allows himself a few more moments to grieve.

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A few months later, Megumi has left for Aizu, and Kenshin has an epiphany while doing laundry. Kaoru has always always come back for him before… So why not now? This time he doesn't crush the fragile hope rising in his chest. He glances at the gates daily after this.

Perhaps this is why an oro slips when Yahiko says the woman blue-black hair and blue eyes asked him for a spar. On some level, he hadn't expected her to come back. At least, he thinks she's Kaoru. His anticipation rises as he watches the woman's moves with Yahiko. "...Kaoru?" The look in Yahiko's eyes is part pleading and part hope. Kenshin feels the same way, and notes how she hasn't looked in his direction even once. "Of course Little Yahiko." Yahiko's chest puffs and he starts shouting about being called little with a grin on his face. Kenshin only has eyes for Kaoru when she flashes a grin in his direction and taps once. He has only one thought as he presses his face to her hair. Finally, Kaoru is home.


End file.
